Friday 5 July 2019

The Disappearance of Gerry Adams (Part 1)

No-one has an exact date for when it happened, but sometime during the 1970s or early 1980s, Gerry Adams disappeared and was replaced by Gerry Adams. Whilst Gerry looks and sounds like Gerry, they are most definitely not the same person. I understand how this can be confusing at first, so for the purpose of clarity, I shall call the real Gerry Adams, 'Real Gerry', and the fake Gerry will be referred to as 'Theme Park Gerry', for reasons that I shall now explain. 


Theme Park Gerry is a Disneyfied cartoon character. A reimagined version of the real Gerry Adams, played by an actor inside a costume, following a carefully crafted script. Whilst followers of Sinn Fein are prone to reaching the point of rapture whenever two or more gather at his feet, seasoned observers say that Theme Park Gerry's utterances about his reimagined past, are about as plausible as Gordon Brown's  claim that he enjoyed listening to the Arctic Monkeys.



There is a school of thought within certain sections of society, including Irish Republicanism, that Theme Park Gerry is an elaborate narrative, manufactured with the intention to distance Theme Park Gerry from the nefarious activities of Real Gerry. Some people who freely admit to PIRA membership, such as the late Billy McKee, have stated that not only is Real Gerry and Theme Park Gerry one and the same person, but that Real Gerry had also reached the dizzy heights of the Provisional IRA Army Council (PAC). 


Here is
McKee on Gerry Adams: "He was chief of staff, army council and OC Belfast yet he says he was never in the IRA, for him to get up and say that was the daftest thing I have ever heard." 

Further undermining Theme Park Gerry's back story, are allegations from convicted PIRA terrorists such as Brendan Hughes and Dolours Price, who have recounted their exploits within PIRA and stated that Theme Park Gerry was not only Real Gerry, but that Real Gerry was their Officer Commanding within PIRA's Belfast Brigade. Both Hughes and Price were annoyed that Real Gerry had chosen to distance himself from his past, by manufacturing a reimagined past, in which he was not in PIRA, engaged in various activities with them.


Perhaps understandably, Theme Park Gerry is always quick to dismiss any claims that he is actually Real Gerry with the awkward and illegal terrorist past, but the level of public incredulity, with regards to Theme Park Gerry's back story, means that those of us watching from the side lines, are now left with a difficult choice; accept that an implausible and often mocked Disneyfied reimagination of the past, is actually the truth, or opt for the rather unpleasant terrorist alternative. That dear reader, is entirely your choice.


In part 2 of this blog, we will take a wander back in time and look at some of the PIRA related events in which Theme Park Gerry was supposedly involved, as a fully paid up member of that organisation. We can then decide for ourselves if the claims made about him are true, or just the product of enemies within Irish Republicanism and British securocrats dabbling in black propaganda.






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